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What Do You Get When You Mix Dynamite and Nitroglycerin?

I am a scientist. I am Dr. Isaiah Lavell Kehl.

I do not take things seriously.

Scientists don’t say what if I add nitroglycerin and dynamite together, do they?

No.

That would be thinking of something seriously, and that would be nuts.

dynamite and nitro.jpg


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Isaiah on Marriage

Isaiah: I’m gonna meet a girl, fall in love, get married and move some where warm. Like California or New Jersey.

Me: New Jersey’s not warm.

Isaiah: Yeah, but I like the way it sounds. New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey. New Jersey where the palm trees sway in New Jersey.

welcome to new jersey


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Isaiah on Fire Control

Do you really think you should fight fire with fire?

Don’t you think you should fight fire with water?

-Isaiah

fire with fire.jpg


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Isaiah on Burglary

Isaiah: If a robber took me away from the house, do you think he’d let me rob with him?

Extremely concerned mom: No!

Isaiah: Why not? What if I really begged him?

Horrified mom: No!

Isaiah: Well mom, let’s just wait and see, OK?

Isaiah On Burglary


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The Definition of Compromise

The Isaiah International Dictionary

Compromise is when people are talking and talking and talking and talking and won’t stop. So you have to listen and that’s a compromise.

compromise

 

How Puppies Are Born

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Just Incase You Didn’t Know

“I am a doctor of inspeciality, not a fool.”

you talking to me


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Story Time With Isaiah – Jerlangerly Booberlanker

Jerlangerly Booberlanker

Jerlangerly Booberlanker is a slug with a tail. The cool part about it is instead of it normally going to bed and having a nice night, it’s sort of electric.

When it’s time to go to bed it breaks in to a home and plugs in its energy. He’s not really a robot, he’s really an animal with a 70 inch DY Firepick battery.

It’s an optical illusion so when people are asleep and they come downstairs he plugs himself in and he can become anything he wants just by thinking. Like a vacuum cleaner.

His inventor is famous in London and has his picture in Buckingham Palace. His name is Professor Von Schickelbottom.

Professor Von Schickellbottom

Professor Von Schickelbottom was the world’s best mad scientist. He’s won awards and is not liable to give up yet.

He was killed in 1892 when he was most famous for inventing these 10 things:

  1. Car
  2. Lightbulb
  3. Palaces
  4. Automatic Woodcutter
  5. Locomotive
  6. Airplane
  7. Car
  8. Crate
  9. Toys

He was a true man. He never lied, never cheated and always listened to God. The only bad thing he ever did was blow up one of his shacks, but it turned out to be a good thing, because he made the best invention a long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long time ago.

The last invention this greatest inventor of all time ever made in 1872, he almost cut off his finger making it, and this invention was TNT!

Yes my good friends! He invented the dynamite! The best invention of all time!

Thank you very much, this has been Isaiah of Dr Isaiah Lavell Kehl Incorporated of the Lavell Estate and all the Lavells before it. I invented a Sulker Boykee. What’s a Sulker Boykee you must ask? It’s when you say Sulker Boykee and you can get whatever you want.

Isaiah Dr Lavell Kehl – You can find out more about me by going to IsaiahDotCom or check your local library. And please do not go on the internet without your parent’s permission.