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Storytime with Isaiah

isaiah story shel silverstein

 

I’ve been eaten by a Kalabazoo

A horrible nasty Kalabazoo

Now please close this book

I don’t want him to eat you too.

So if anyone asks you

what’s a Kalabazoo

say you don’t want to find out.

Whatever you do,

if you have a rhyme book never got to page 22.

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Isaiah on Entomology (Bugs)

Isaiah: Mom, when is it going to be Saliva season?

Me: What?

Isaiah: Saliva season, you know, when those crawly little wormy bugs come out.

Me: What?

Isaiah: You know, they’re crawly, and wormy and kind of gross?

Me: Do you mean Cicada season?

Isaiah: No, no! The gross wormy bugs in our garbage can. They wiggle and are gross and white.

Me: Dude! You mean maggots? You want to know when it’s Maggot Season?

maggot farm.jpg

 


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Story Time With Isaiah – Jerlangerly Booberlanker

Jerlangerly Booberlanker

Jerlangerly Booberlanker is a slug with a tail. The cool part about it is instead of it normally going to bed and having a nice night, it’s sort of electric.

When it’s time to go to bed it breaks in to a home and plugs in its energy. He’s not really a robot, he’s really an animal with a 70 inch DY Firepick battery.

It’s an optical illusion so when people are asleep and they come downstairs he plugs himself in and he can become anything he wants just by thinking. Like a vacuum cleaner.

His inventor is famous in London and has his picture in Buckingham Palace. His name is Professor Von Schickelbottom.

Professor Von Schickellbottom

Professor Von Schickelbottom was the world’s best mad scientist. He’s won awards and is not liable to give up yet.

He was killed in 1892 when he was most famous for inventing these 10 things:

  1. Car
  2. Lightbulb
  3. Palaces
  4. Automatic Woodcutter
  5. Locomotive
  6. Airplane
  7. Car
  8. Crate
  9. Toys

He was a true man. He never lied, never cheated and always listened to God. The only bad thing he ever did was blow up one of his shacks, but it turned out to be a good thing, because he made the best invention a long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long time ago.

The last invention this greatest inventor of all time ever made in 1872, he almost cut off his finger making it, and this invention was TNT!

Yes my good friends! He invented the dynamite! The best invention of all time!

Thank you very much, this has been Isaiah of Dr Isaiah Lavell Kehl Incorporated of the Lavell Estate and all the Lavells before it. I invented a Sulker Boykee. What’s a Sulker Boykee you must ask? It’s when you say Sulker Boykee and you can get whatever you want.

Isaiah Dr Lavell Kehl – You can find out more about me by going to IsaiahDotCom or check your local library. And please do not go on the internet without your parent’s permission.